Tag Archives: Guy Fieri

The Next Food Network Star-The Jersey Shore of The Food Network

It is that time of year… The new season of The Next Food Network Star has begun.  If you have read my previous blogs, you know how I feel about most of the “stars” currently on The Food Network. Blonde Stepford Wives.  Well, after watching the premiere of this season, it looks like they have not raised the bar.  Don’t get me wrong, as a HUGE fan of reality television, I understand that producers need BIG personalities in order to make what is mundane entertaining.  But on a Network with Food in its name wouldn’t it make sense that the next star would be an accomplished cook, if not a chef?

But no. Not Food Network. I think casting directors have been watching MTV’s runaway hit Jersey Shore.  And honestly, the kids from Jersey Shore cooked much better family meals while at Seaside Heights then the dishes I saw Food Network contenders prepare during the premiere.  Maybe they are hoping for their own GTL, but instead of Gym Tan Laundry, they would have Grin Talk Laugh.

So… To the actual show. I found the “promos” for the contestants pretend shows to be embarrassing. I mean really, you want to put the big unemployed Chef in a life jacket by a grill? Or how about the sweet, but annoying girl with the flower perpetually in her hair strumming a ukulele while talking about cooking?! My favorite had to be the stand-up comic that grimaced at the camera the entire time, while screaming about burgers.

Then they cooked… Can you hear the DUM DUM DUM music? The task, create a lunch based in fresh California cuisine. Not TOO difficult considering show takes place in L.A. But, it did prove to be too much for most.  One contestant got a little lemon in her eye and couldn’t complete the dessert. She SAYS she is a culinary instructor.  The aforementioned comic “cooked” an arugula, sunburst tomato, shaved parmesan salad with a lemon vinaigrette.  Is this inventive cuisine? To add insult to injury, he completely overdressed his run of the mill dish.  Both desserts fell flat. One girl couldn’t get her soup together in time. A potato with beet reduction. Screams California doesn’t it?

There were a few culinary stand-outs. I liked the way Aria used California olives, Sonoma goat cheese and other fresh California ingredients to create her appetizer- olive foccacia with goat cheese.   Too bad her foccacia bread looked like a raisin scone.  Also, the salmon dish prepared by the wanna-be beatnik in the beret looked good.

Oh yeah, just to note. Wolfgang Puck looked more excited to eat up the Italian attorney with his eyes rather than enjoy her chicken dish.

So, there we have it. One of these people will be the next Melissa D’arabian, Sandra Lee or Guy Fieri.  Hmmmm, come to think of it, this group should fit right in.  And to quote my husband, “We are watching it, aren’t we?”

Yes. Unfortunately, we are.

Attack of the Stepford Blondes on Food Network

Okay… Really? How many stepford like blondes can The Food Network emplo? And yes, I am including Guy Fieri in this list.  So, first we had semi homemade with Sandra Lee. The stepfordiest of all the blondes.  An entire show dedicated to packaged food & ugly “tablescapes”.  Then they gave her Money-Saving Meals, where all of a sudden all the convenient foods she promoted on semi-homemade were now out of the question because they are too expensive.  LOL! Now we havy Melissa D’Arabian with $10 dinners. Wait. Isn’t that what Sandra Lee’s new show is about? I am confused! Another perky blonde that lives to cook for her family.  Don’t forget Giada… A little less stepford, but yet ANOTHER perfect blonde cooking dinner for hubby.  I included Guy Fieri in this because he is a stepford blonde in Ted Hardy clothing.  He is what the execs at Food Network knows is “cool” in middle America’s eyes without being threatening or “scary” (think Anthony Bourdain here).  But really, under the bleached spikes, he is just another stepford wife aiming to please. And when you try to please everybody, you get boring, cookie cutter television.